every day is exactly the same

I woke up this morning and the first thought in my head was a song by Nine Inch Nails.

I believe I can see the future

Cause I repeat the same routine

I think I used to have a purpose

But then again

That might have been a dream

I think I used to have a voice

Now I never make a sound

I just do what I've been told

I really don't want them to come around

Every day is exactly the same

Every day is exactly the same

There is no love here and there is no pain

Every day is exactly the same

The second thought was Psalm 118:24, which says, This is the day that the Lord has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it.

The only thing that's really the same every day is work. 11.00-16.00, 11.00-16.00, 11.00-16.00, 11.00-16.00. But that in itself is not all bad, I can handle the monotony of work. What I can't deal with as well are the parts of my world that are in standstill. It's characteristic of summer, to be devoid of the routine and schedule and the normal that characterizes the school year. But it doesn't make it any easier knowing that, because certain parts of my world have stopped moving and sometimes I genuinely just feel like stopping too. It'd be better, not having to wait but just fast forwarding through the commercials and the slow parts. It'd be more realistic, to acknowledge those are part of the episode and just be patient and sit it out. It'd be absolutely ideal, to live up those moments every bit as much as the exciting scenes.

What if I could recognize the beauty of each individual day? What if they didn't all just blend into one, but instead I saw the world the way P.O.D. does in "Alive"?

Everyday is a new day

I'm thankful for every breath I take

I won't take you for granted

So I learn from my mistakes

It's beyond my control

Sometimes just letting it go

Whatever happens in this lifetime

So I trust in love

You have given me peace of mind

I think the key really is having an attitude of thanksgiving, because otherwise the new and the different can simply happen too subtly to be noticed. In those times I've found the Lord throws something huge at you, to make sure you don't miss it. It came in the form of a long-awaited phone call from SLO UMC. It's been about a month of (I'm sure) very annoying phone calls from me, trying to just get an estimate from them on how much it'd cost EPIC to rent their sanctuary once a week in the fall. We really need a new location, and we were down to their church as the only place we were really pursuing. For one event, they usually charge $500.00 for their sanctuary. The most I could do was explain our financial situation, and pray with everything I had that they would be willing to help us out. Would you believe they'll let us have it for $100.00 a month?! That's even less than the thirty dollars per use I'd originally suggested. It just blew my mind when she told me. She said their committee agreed they loved that we were part of Cal Poly and were a Christian ministry, and they wanted to make it work for us. The very first thing I did was call Ptub, and he was just as excited as I was. We have a location for next year!!! I can't believe it.

So as soon as I hung up, I decided to start my day over at 11.48.